6/28/15

My little ones

Salt Lake City, July 2014

Tonight I'm feeling nostalgic.

In the year since we took these photos, we have experienced a lifetime worth of memories and emotions. Fond memories, painful lessons, triumphant moments, overwhelming joy mixed with trials and difficult decisions. There were moments where I felt close to God and could clearly see the path He had illuminated for our little family. Other times it felt that a mile-thick brick wall separated me from Him and His divine guidance.

The gift of time has granted me experience and wisdom. The older I get, the more I treasure time with my young family because these years are fleeting. I so badly want to cling to these young, chaotic years because they are beautiful in a very, VERY exhausting way.

This afternoon as I laid Liam to sleep, I stood over him for a few minutes, letting the image of his chubby cheeks pressed against his mattress and his squishy toes soak into my memory. I take lots of pictures. I wish I took more, honestly. But I didn't want a picture to remember that moment; I wanted that image of him sleeping peacefully etched in my memory forever.

I never want to forget the look of concern on Paxton's face when I told him my tummy was aching, to which he so lovingly replied, "I can rub it for you, Mama."

I never want to forget Crew sitting in my lap, discovering my "speckles" (freckles) with enthusiasm.

I never want to forget the loud vrooming and crashing noises the boys make when they play with legos or trains.

I never want the piles of little unmatched socks to disappear from my bedroom floor.

I want the slobber-covered mirror stains to remain, because then I'll remember Liam making-out with his own reflection.

I never want to forget when they whisper that they want to marry me because such a secret is manifestation that I'm doing something right.

My life has turned out to be NOTHING I expected, especially the surrounded-by-boys part, but I wouldn't change a thing.

July 5, 2014-- Salt Lake City Temple


Crew at Paxton's Pre-School graduation, May 2014

Apple Hill, October 2014



Apple Hill, October 2014


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